Home Care in Fulshear, TX
Sandy always loved listening to her grandmother tell her stories about when she was younger. She felt like she had heard all of them so many times that she could probably repeat them word for word, but she enjoyed listening to Rose recall all of the special times from when she was a child growing up, how she met her husband, and the things they used to do together when their children were younger.
One day, however, Rose started telling a story that Sandy did not recognize. Rather than talking about her husband Howard, she started talking about a young man named Seth and their relationship. She spoke animatedly and seemed extremely emotionally invested in what she was saying. Sandy was somewhat upset by the sudden change in the life story she had always known, but decided to put it behind her. The next time she visited to take care of her grandmother, though, the stories about Seth continued.
Rose started telling her new stories about this man every time she visited and soon Sandy figured out that she was not actually telling her memories about an old love, but making up the stories. She spoke with Sandy’s doctor, who confirmed that Sandy was progressing through the stages of dementia. Together they decided to approach these made-up stories carefully and integrate managing them into Rose’s elderly care plan. Over time Sandy came to enjoy listening to Rose talk about Seth and looked forward to hearing more about what her grandmother was experiencing in her mind, even if they were not true memories.
It is not uncommon for seniors suffering from dementia to start telling stories that are made up, but that they present as, and believe to be, absolute truth. Depending on the nature of the stories, these made up memories can be extremely upsetting both for the senior and her caregivers. Approaching this tendency properly can reduce anxiety and prevent serious emotional consequences.
Use these tips to help you, your family, and your parents’ elderly health care services provider manage the “made-up” in your loved ones lives:
• Determine impact. Sometimes seniors come up with stories because they are no longer capable of recounting memories of their own so their minds develop false memories based on snippets it can bring forward out of the memory as well as stimuli from outside sources such as books, movies, and television. Often these stories are completely harmless, but they may become abusive or frightening in nature, causing a negative impact on those listening. If your parents start making up stories, carefully examine the potential impact of those stories and make sure that they are not upsetting people.
• Guide memories. If you find that the stories are upsetting, or they could cause problems for your seniors or other members of the family, or you simply want them to connect with actual memories, guide your seniors gently. Acknowledge the story they told, and then offer the reality. For example, you can tell your mother, “No, Dad never worked in an auto factory. He was a lawyer,” or remind your father, “You didn’t meet Mom when you were in the service in France because you were stationed in Germany.” Reminding them of these facts gently disarms the stories and makes them seem more like minor memory lapses than false information.
• Enjoy them. For the most part, stories made up by elderly adults with dementia are harmless. Unless they are upsetting your parents or those around you, or they could lead to harm to others, they are essentially a source of entertainment for your parents and you can look at them in the same way. Allow your parents to entertain you with these stories and enjoy knowing that your parents have the opportunity to treasure memories, even if they are not completely true. This reduces anxiety and can give them an emotional boost.
If you or an aging loved one are considering home care in Fulshear, TX, or the surrounding areas, please contact SYNERGY HomeCare of Houston at (832) 803-0011.
