By Dr. Macie Smith
Caring for a family member can be very rewarding, but the 1 in 5 Americans who do so on a daily basis can promise you that it’s not always easy. Caregivers face a range of new and possibly scary emotions, an emerging identity crisis, and a toll on both their physical and mental health. It’s important to know that this is normal and that there is help.
Understanding Emotional Stress in Family Caregivers
There are a lot of emotions involved in being a family caregiver. These emotions include anger, resentment, guilt, sadness, grief, worry and loneliness. It’s possible that caregivers may be unaware of the exact emotion they are feeling, which may lead to stress.
That’s why taking the time for some self-reflection or conversation with a trusted friend or family member or even a professional can help you understand your emotions and why you are experiencing them. Once you can name the emotion, give yourself permission to feel it. It’s okay to have these feelings. They are real and valid. But the danger here is that if these emotions remain unchecked, it may have a negative effect on the person receiving care.
Managing the Caregiver Identity Crisis
Family caregivers often struggle with an identity crisis of sorts: Are you a caregiver or are you the adult child of an older adult? One of the reasons family caregivers experience a great deal of stress is that they are in constant conflict with these two roles. It’s not the actual delivery of care that is stressful, it is being at odds with this new identity the adult child has assumed.
The stress shows up in different ways, such as feeling resentful that caregiving activities and responsibilities are infringing on other aspects of the caregiver’s life, such as time and energy to address other family obligations, leisure activities, and personal privacy. The caregiver can also feel taken advantage of by the care receiver who demands more care than the caregiver feels is warranted. And as the stress accumulates, family caregivers can begin to feel depressed.
How Caregiving Impacts Physical and Mental Health
Very often, the demands of caregiving can take a toll on someone’s physical health, relationships and overall quality of life. Stress, anxiety, depression, unhealthy eating habits, and sleep deprivation can lead to other health-related issues. Caregiving can also be an isolating experience. Family caregivers often sacrifice their own social lives, hobbies and sometimes even their careers to maintain proper care for their loved one. By giving up these social outlets, depression symptoms can be amplified.
Effective Self-Care Strategies for Family Caregivers
I always like to say you can’t fix what you don’t face, and you can’t address what you don’t acknowledge. While we can’t prevent stress, we CAN have a plan for managing it in the most effective way for you.
• Positive self-talk can help manage stress. For example: Instead of saying, “I can’t do this,” say, “I’ll do the best I can. I’ve got this.”
• Getting some form of exercise or activity can go a long way in reducing stress – and it doesn’t have to involve an hour-long session at the gym. Try some easy stretching or a few yoga poses in your living room, going for a walk around the block or having a 10-minute dance party in your kitchen.
• It’s also really important to get enough sleep. Aim for 7-8 hours a night and don’t be afraid to prioritize a quick power nap during the day. Taking a short 20-minute nap has been shown to reduce cortisol levels, which aids in stress relief.
As a caregiver, there is no shame in reaching out for help for yourself. Your local Area Agency on Aging (AAA) can connect caregivers with a range of helpful resources. These can include support groups, transportation assistance and home care services.
How Respite Care Helps Prevent Caregiver Burnout
Respite care is one of the most popular services that can provide temporary relief to family caregivers by giving them a break from their everyday responsibilities. Respite care programs are incredibly flexible and entirely personalized. You can arrange to have services for only a few hours a week if your loved one is mostly independent, or conversely, you can have a regular caregiver come in for hours every day if your loved one needs more support.
Don’t wait until burnout finally catches up with you to actually reach out for help. Instead, recognize the need for a caregiver to have a work-life balance and utilize these services to take the time to focus on your self-care. Even if it’s for something as simple as giving you a few hours to go socialize with friends, respite care can make a big difference.
Prioritizing Self-Care for Better Caregiving Outcomes (Conclusion)
The most important thing to remember is that in order to properly care for someone else, a caregiver first needs to care for themself. Managing the complex emotional and physical toll of caregiving allows you to place person-centered care front and center. Being able to do this is critical to optimizing quality of life and positive outcomes for those we care for. If you need help managing your own well-being or your loved one’s care, please call SYNERGY HomeCare at 877-432-2692 for more assistance.
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SYNERGY HomeCare offers no obligation home assessments. Find a location near you or contact us to learn how we can provide additional support to you and your loved ones.
Dr. Macie P. Smith is a licensed gerontology social worker who is focused on helping families support their aging loved ones through long-term care. Specifically, Dr. Smith educates caregivers on how to care for seniors with dementia. She is an advocate for specialized care and assists others in finding a way to provide a better quality of life for individuals with Alzheimer’s or dementia. Dr. Smith has dedicated over 22 years of her life working in gerontology and assisting families in finding personalized solutions for dementia care. For more articles by Dr. Macie Smith, click here.
